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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26037949">jason fucking todd</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueeeee/pseuds/blueeeee'>blueeeee</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>gotham's various cryptids: tales of a tired waitress [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Batman - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Blood, Crack, Gen, Rating for Language, also this is my first time posting here so yay, anyway yeah this is straight crack inspired by a tumblr post, but no onscreen violence, enjoy, hah, lets see how this goes, tales of a tired waitress, why is rating for deadpool's language a tag</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 08:22:31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>259</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26037949</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueeeee/pseuds/blueeeee</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>went to a waffle house at 3 am, covered in blood, tipped $200 to his waitress and never went back.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>gotham's various cryptids: tales of a tired waitress [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1890028</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>125</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>jason fucking todd</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>emma was having a bad day. she flunked an essay, her mom’s cat died, her dorm got broken into, and she had the goddamn nightshift. again.</p>
<p>really, she was so done with today’s shit.</p>
<p>so when jason fucking todd, who was supposed to be dead, walked through the doors, covered in blood, she didn’t even blink an eye.</p>
<p>“why the fuck not. a ghost dripping blood. what the fuck is going on, today. who hurt you.”</p>
<p>he just laughed. </p>
<p>“ooh is that ship of the dead?” he asked. “mallory is my favorite. she’s badass.”</p>
<p>and, well, who was she to deny what was probably a coffee induced hallucination an intellectual conversation about rick riordan’s various books?</p>
<p>~~~</p>
<p>“i can’t tell if i’m hallucinating or not, but i should probably do my job. so, what do you want?”</p>
<p>“like, five scrambled eggs, and a shit ton of your strongest alcohol.”</p>
<p>“sir, this is a waffle house.”</p>
<p>he just gave her a deadpan look and gestured to his clothes. “your point?”</p>
<p>emma sighed. “do you really want me to break into my boss’s stash? who am i kidding. of course you do.”</p>
<p>~~~</p>
<p>it was only when jason was leaving did the fog clear from her mind.</p>
<p>“wait a sec. aren’t you dead?”</p>
<p>he just winked and walked out the door.</p>
<p>and if emma just so happened to see a bit of red hood’s helmet peeking out of his duffle bag, well, that’s none of her business.</p>
<p>plus, he tipped like 200 dollars. maybe she should start taking the night shift more often.</p>
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